I Let You Go

“Everything has changed. The instant the car slid across the wet tarmac, my whole life changed. I can see everything clearly, as though I am standing on the sidelines. I can’t go on like this.” 

When readers meet Jenna Gray, they assume she is Jacob’s mother. So this early statement, which takes place before she has left Ian, seems to refer to the fact that the death of her son has left her bereft. Everything has changed because her only love, her son, has died. Looking back after the big twist is revealed, it is clear that Jenna is referring to the abusive nature of her relationship with Ian. The incident has revealed her husband’s true nature to her, as well as the fact that she has been hiding it from everyone—including herself. Following the “accident,” she takes steps for the first time to leave him. They are drastic but reflect her current state of mind.  

“I had thought her intact, but as I touch her the clay moves beneath my hands, and I’m left with two broken pieces. I look at them, then I hurl them with all my strength toward the wall, where they shatter into tiny pieces that show down onto my desk.”

Initially, when encountering this scene, readers do not quite understand its import. They only know that this character has found all her sculptures, everything she has created, ruined and broken. Jenna notes about the statue in question that, “This one is me” (19). Of course, the author intends this to be an allegory. Jenna is broken and shattered inside as a result of the accident and of Ian’s actions. She blames herself, in part because she has been conditioned that way by her husband.